This is a classic dilemma that plagues trains, movie theatres and waiting rooms all over the world. It's also an issue I think about for probably a lot longer than necessary every time I'm faced with the problem. Who gets the Middle Armrest?
This situation is easy to resolve if the person in the seat adjacent to you is someone you know. You simply ask, "Hey, can I use this to rest my arm on?" And if they're cool, they'll say, "Yeah, for sure." If they're your sibling though, they will NEVER LET YOU HAVE IT. It's in the Sibling Code of Conduct: Section 15: Paragraph 3: A sibling will under no circumstances voluntarily allow their brother/sister to use the middle armrest without A) Constantly nudging said brother/sister's arm or B) Making a scene.
I don't make up the rules.
I know it's also possible to share the armrest, yes. But only with someone you know. Touching elbows with a person who you don't know is, for lack of any other word that could possibly describe it, awkward. But it's weird that it's so awkward. It's not like the elbow is a particularly erogenous zone. I think it's actually probably the least sexy place on the body. So that can't be the reason. I personally think that we find accidental elbow touching so weird because it's usually so unexpected. And I always panic. Like, should I look at them now? Should I apologise for brushing their body part with my own? Should I ignore it and pretend it didn't happen? Are we better seat-friends now that we've had physical contact? These are all things that go through my head when I experience an accidental elbow-brush.
So who gets the armrest? I usually stick with the opinion that if the other person was there first, they get first dibs. If they seem uninterested after a while, then I take it over, at least for a little bit. That seems reasonable. But the real problem for me occurs when I was there first and someone sits down and immediately claims the armrest. This person is probably a little more up front about things and they're also A HUGE A-HOLE. I'm mostly joking, but I do always get a bit annoyed. Like, this person thinks they're the freaking Roman Empire or something.
Then there's always the "No one uses the armrest just in case," scenario. What if the other person needs to get up to pee and needs to balance themselves with the armrest? What if there is a shoulder cramp and the other person needs more elbow room? What if they're reading a particularly shocking novel and they need to grab the armrest for support? If your arm is there, you're going to impose on their armrest emergency, and no one wants that.
The funny thing is that there is one option that almost no one ever goes for, and it's the easiest one: Ask if your seat-mate minds if you take up the armrest. I think it shows respect and appreciation for your fellow human beings. It says, "I know you're here, and I know this armrest is partially yours, and I welcome your opinion." But I hate talking to people, so this fantastic citizen will never be me.
