Wednesday 4 July 2012

Marilyn Monroe Didn't Even Say That Stuff

Okay, so if you're an internet using person (which I assume you are because you're reading this), you've seen all the ... I don't even know what to call them ... posters? all over the place. You know them, they're quotes posted on a nice little background. Some of them are funny, some of them are inspiring and all of them are stupid (according to me.) "Whoa, whoa, whoa. I think those things are totally neat!" you're probably saying to your computer screen right now. On some level I agree with you, they're nice the first time you see them. But once they get shared a billion times on Facebook and Tumblr and copied to statuses and tweeted and instagramed (myspaced? Google+ed?,) this is when they get terrible and annoying.

But I can ignore the little poster things, some of them are pretty hilarious. But I can't help but think, "okay, who actually said this?" So, being the professional Googler that I am, I like to Google these sayings. And guess what? Apparently about a thousand different people are credited with saying some of this stuff. Wait, what? Yeah, imagine that. The internet, the world's largest "grapevine," has reposted and skewed these things so many times that no one even knows who said half of them anymore. I believe you people are familiar with the game Telephone?

Let's take the beloved Marilyn Monroe for example. According to girl's tweets and statuses everywhere, she has said some totally awesome stuff. And some of it may have actually come out of her mouth, but upon further investigation, most of it did not. Sorry to squish your beliefs ladies. (Side note: MM wasn't even a size 16, apparently. Of course, this info could also be fake.)

I know we'll never live in a world where we only quote things that we actually heard come out of someone's mouth, but think about how nice it would be, for the sake of the actual speaker. Am I right?
Maybe I'm just a little grumpy because I spend tons of time thinking up my own interesting (maybe) stuff to put on the internet while other people just spend their time sharing fake quotes that they claim are "totally the story of my life," or whatever (This is exactly the reason I'm writing this, don't let anything else I say fool you), or maybe I'm just worried about plagiarism and the rights of the author but either way, I've had enough of this unoriginal crap that is spewed all over the place without a thought for who said it, where they said it, what the context was, and if they were really talking about what you think they were talking about. (And that, my friends, was a run-on sentence.)

So, to sum this all up, let's all try to be a little more original, okay? Or at least appreciate the stuff the little people (me) have to say on the internet, because they're (I'm) trying their (my) best to entertain you with their (my) brilliant minds. And for the love of goodness, please stop quoting "Marilyn Monroe" and just appreciate her for being super hot or something.

2 comments:

  1. I couldn't agree with you more about the dubious nature of quote attributions on the net. In my own research, I've found that the most oft' quote mis-attributees are Albert Einstein, Buddha, & Marilyn Monroe in that order.

    Thanks for writing this. I like to close with a quote from one of the greatest living minds of our time:

    "Fuckin-A" -- Noam Chomsky

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    1. Thanks so much for reading. I didn't even think about Einstein, but it's totally obvious.

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